Scribbles – 23


When I think of you.
I think of the heat
that can be me and you,
even tho I know I have you…

I can never have you…

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“Next To You…”


Broken Glass

I’m lost
I’m torn
I’m troubled
I see if I can escape
Escape
To places where I should not be
I can’t return
Crossed over
Crossed that place in time
Crossed
Crossed that line
I know where I want to be
Know where I need to be
It’s not the same as where I am
Or where I should be
Fragments of me
Lost in memory
Dreaming
Thoughts
My thoughts
Not perfect
I long for the past
The present can stay
I think of those choice days
I could reconfigure
To change my steps
Realign what I need to do
So I can end up…

Next to you…

© Da Absentee 2013

*****

Dedicated to the “Ones” who got away! It’s the whole go back in time and “What would I do different?” question. It’s me telling my past love that I didn’t even know I had; of the desire to change history to be with them. It’s the sadness that comes with knowing that such things will and cannot ever happen…???

As Always…

Stay Positive!

“On Being Family”


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Much to say
being who we are
thick water
sons, daughters
protectors and friends

know how and when
not where it ends
time never separate bonds
no matter
how colorful or rude
it’s who you are

we love for who we are
not what we want each other to be

don’t have to talk
to understand
good plus rough
situations
we don’t need solutions
just an attentive ear

on being family
just know
I am here
thankful to be blessed
by all your years
it would not be the same
without you here

like any occasion
we get together
to celebrate or mourn
it’s the time together
that keeps the heart warm

© Da Absentee 2011

*****

I really don’t write about my family much. Even tho I know I owe them the most for how my brain works and how I view things in my life. If it wasnt for them I would not be me; but in my latter life I distanced myself from them. This is just to say I love them no matter how it may seem. It is not what it looks like.

As Always…

Stay Positive!

“Thoughts On Family”


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They never bring smiles
frustration maybe
disapproval and frowns
backward thinking
havent seen that in a while
I know I do the same
sometimes…
hopefully that’s shrinking
unlike this page for inking
it brings an understanding
resentment and revelation
willing participation
it’s for this is why I took the vacation

© Da Absentee 2012

*****

I purposely moved far away from my family. It was everything negative that they had to bring that made me have to distance myself. I love them all the same. I am here if they need me, after all they are family. I love them for who they are, not for what I want them to be.

As Always…

Stay Positive!

“Golden” #Repost


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Silent behind 4 walls
sunrise, cool night breeze lingers in the window.
eventful day, schedule shows
first back & forth
silhouettes erode
breakfast, clean and launder clothes
buttery eggs
with toast on salty lips
days off
no face
no clock ticks
work indoors as the day glows
some skin exposed.
Turning transition clears turns, turns you to me…
we clean every which way
reflection cleaner to class the day
you’re in solid form
almost norm
fluff all the right places
just my height
just my taste
you know your just my shape
fruit salad your just my plate
wait…
landscape…
wax, polish, spit shine
with a slow song written all over your face
the salad, green tart grapes
easy music listening
dishes sparkling, shotting gin on a lazy day
stirred not shaken
regular wash
hardly starched
don’t need you done up
just lightly dressed
sandals, panties, bra, worn flowered dress
not going anywhere so you can skip the rest
hints and quips
never speech
silent but understood
bending. sweeping. standing on feet.
I just stare…
everything else .. obsolete
smell of fresh clean laundry fills the air
kid searching… find them nowhere
just me & you
you & me
I & you
you & I…
lovely how the time…
…turtles… by
quick snack
20 minute adult nap
barter nick knacks
warm popsicle
for a hot snatch
then calibrate the rest of the day
just to relax.
sun floats down while the night falls
finally we drift silent behind 4 walls…

© Da Absentee 2011

*****

When I wrote this, I was in the middle of a mini vacation where it so happen that the wife and I were able to spend the day alone. Without the kids “enjoying ourselves”.

As Always…

Stay Positive!