“Thoughts – 20”

Posted by Da Absentee on August 31, 2013

In dark corners
someone abandoned the child
with pain hidden
street cold eyes
getting older
staying high
red shot
closed
but not done crying
lonesome nights
unwanted homes
dreams
money, chrome
loving husband
beautiful home
held by pincers
held by crabs
telling you
you can’t win
weigh down like slabs
knifes ready
so they back stab
laying in the shadow of street-lights
hiding from night lights

i`m praying you change
make differences
to your life…

*****

When all the hurt in your life has come to a head, you feel like your back is against a wall, enemies, situation, and life is doing nothing but holding you down you have no more tears to be shed… This is when I hope you tell yourself… Get up. There are changes to be made. I’m going to stay positive, adapt, and move forward…

As Always…

Stay Positive!

*****

“After Forgiveness”

Posted by Da Absentee on August 26, 2013

I`m confused
misplaced the love
wrapped up in you
how can it be used
salvaged
for everything going right
everything can go wrong
possibly summed up
in a sappy, silly love song
replaced
by everyday existence
by trouble or a dollar
know you hurt
I see you cry
even tho no tears are shed
I see it in your eyes
your scared ; no fear
catch a flat
become your spare
those wheels to turn
to get you out of there.
despair…
get you somewhere
a tad more vibrant
a drop more bold
someplace
where our union
can focus and hold
become an affirmation
for others to see
example
of real and perfect fantasy

*****

The cycle of life, or is it more of relationships? Fighting and disagreeing everything going wrong. This is a moment of introspection. Where we hope for the best.

As Always…

Stay Positive!

“In A Small Space”

Posted by Da Absentee on August 21, 2013

Plenty or a lot,
some or a little left to go
I don’t really know
seems like someone always has somewhere important to go
its times like this
tight recycled air
germs percolate from who knows where
in crowded spaces
unknown faces to distant places
like vultures circle ready to feed
If they succeed at the task ahead
resting bed
pillow, sheets and seats for weary heads
let’s get this day going
so we can bring it to its end
do it right the first time
so we don’t have to do again
i`m already far from home
so I don’t need to pretend
just use this silence to pick up my pen
traffic moves fast-slow
wind blows as I sit
inspiration flows
all waiting for transportation I suppose
who knows why the auto goes
17 in taught circulation
all with hesitation
waiting to arrive at destinations
I have no idea why we are waiting
watching everything go by the window
thinking of what all it could be
after all the time spent
we look for the right pursuit
the right suit, the right shoes
the don’t
the do`s
even the who`s
repentance and purges
subsiding the uncontrollable urges
humanitarian and national service
I don’t see the difference
nor instance
detailing on edge and hanging from railings
knowing i`m living with
fear of failing

*****

This was written while in a greyhound bus waiting for new passengers from transfers. These are just thoughts of how or why in this moment we 17 people ended up together, in this small space…

As Always…

Stay Positive!

“Is It Destined For…”

Posted by Da Absentee on August 16, 2013

just as distant…

as old textbooks and encyclopedias on the shelves

asking… what else?

just to describe myself

finding out inside

is somewhere else…

it’s not the same on the outside…

here with me

I tell myself things

I truly don’t want to hear

don’t want to believe

after broken hearts

anger sparks

hot heads in cold beds

staring at the ceiling

trying to compromise

use these dealings

expressing flaws

drop jaws

wild-eyed and in awe

can this become what it was before?…

is it destined for

an edge; a cliff;

or fall…

*****

This site really is personal; for me anyway. I am no relationship guru. I experience things and then write about it. This is a reflection of one of those down points in a relationship when you question if it is really worth all the headache that it truly causes.

As Always…

Stay Positive!