I’ll let you go…
Let me get up;
so you can lay down slow…
I’ll let you go…
Let me get up;
so you can lay down slow…
When a single crab is put into a lidless bucket, they surely can and will escape. However, when more than one share a bucket, none can get out. If one crab elevates themself above all, the others will grab this crab and drag’em back down to share the mutual fate of the rest of the group.
Often used to describe social situations where one person is trying to better themself and others in the community attempt to pull them back down.
As a people we see this all too often. It can be applied to so many areas of life. Instead of trying to build each other up we constantly pull and put each other down. Instead of using our experiences and knowledge to help be a footing to help others, so that they can get a foot; we shoot them in foot!
The modern day syndrome of negativity where we always hate and discourage one another is just staggering. Friends envy friends, family plotting against family. In all truth family members are probably the most guilty of the ‘crab mentality’. The reason being they are usually the closest to you, have more access to you and will be the first to see any progress on a small or larger scale. Which they will be ready to judge, poke and dis-member.
In the work place we do not work as a cohesive unit, we steal ideas, act as whistleblowers and discourage forward thinking simply because our thinking is that we should be better off than a co-worker. This then leads to ‘double work’ less productivity, less morale and quality of work then falters.
I can safely say that as a society especially in the black community we have inadvertently set up a standard “hate policy”. That any and everything that is not set with the ‘norm’ or is not aligned with our way of thinking and understanding that “If it is not for us. Then it must be against us.”
I believe that everyone with reasonably decent parenting in their lives would have been told at one point or another that it was “ok, to share” . Something in-stilled so early in life should have had a better hold in our core way of thinking because it is (I think) the simplest way of thinking to defeat ‘crab mentality’.
We come to points in our lives where sometimes we have to be that ‘co-star’. We have to fight the urge and longing to be the ones in the limelight. We have to become the person on the side doing the work and doing more, the behind the scenes that never gets the proper credit . These are the type of people, the inspirations, the muses and the supports who do more by playing their position for the better good.
We have become ok with being opposites and pulling in the other direction. we have set up a constant negative. That women must sleep around to get ahead. Everyone is looking for the quick buck, that no one wants to work hard anymore or he must be selling drugs way of thinking.
Who is to blame? We only have ourselves to blame.
We as black people should attempt to be a part of the ‘Talented Tenth’ where we help each other progress, set goals to improve ourselves which in turn, improve our surroundings which will improve others around us.
We need to strive to be a platform to help each other up and propel from. So that when one of us arrives to a new level, we always turn around and bring the ones we have surpassed. That the cycle of help, support, encouragement and goodwill continues on…
When I first sat down to write this I thought “Oh this is going to be easy!” All I have to do is tell my thoughts to the world and wish them a happy life.
Then it hit me “When you say it like that..” It seems easy enough, but to actually pick and assemble the best set of words and thoughts to say all of that in like 3 minutes. That’s when it gets a little bit harder. How could I… I mean really grasp what I wanted to say.
Praise, Acknowledgement, Family, Commitment and Love in a couple of paragraphs. How could I assure everyone who reads this; to let them know that through the trials, hard times and just life in general; that marriage is a good decision for both parties, that this is how it is meant to be. That “Love can conquer all” it just needs respect & reverence to keep it in line. To be able to tell newlyweds that this is a symbol, a contract, unyielding and completely binding. A true test of forever.
Some people could never share and discuss their lives with friends like they can family. Now when I say family, I mean there’s no way you can deny this person of being who they are to you. When you say loyal, supportive, stubborn, a down right pain in the …., someone to never skimp words and always tell you when your wrong or right, stand by you in a fight. To always be there even if you can’t see them, just like the stars at night. You can always depend on them to be who he or she is and to follow through.
I know sometimes; more importantly in today’s world, that this can turn into a fling or some disillusionment.
Teams that take these steps are centuries of mankind trying to come together for a definitive purpose. To finally see them coming together to make a statement in front of their family and friends. Where they make history with a rite of passage and celebration. To hold each other so dear and close. This was always down the road, and everyone here knows that this is not the easy way out. So as these and many more of the memories to come and linger on for years I wish the world a strong and healthy life.
Marriage is dedication, the battling of life together. It is poetry. It is love songs. The union can be dreams. Reality and fantasy… Bonded, together… In my opinion…
“Even if you walk in darkness, you can still walk with light. Fight to never let it consume you. Never let that darkness put out your light.”
A little something for you.
Poet, Writer and Perfomer
Black Women's Lifestyle Guide | Black Hair | Black Love
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