“Thoughts – 28”


There is remorse
in having to admit
The kinks in your armor
Any sign of weakness
Spilling of your soul
Something hurtful to confess
A spot of soft flesh.

Putting anything on the line
Out in the open
There are riddles
That should be left unspoken
Examples of not being

All you can be
How can you live with not being you
Truly…

Another one for the pile
Of interrogation
On the subject of…

“Who should I be?..”
© Da Absentee 2015
As Always…
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“Silence That Destroys”


The little things seems to be the only thing that unravel our close knit seams

interrupt and dismantle our dreams

im at fault for my own uphill battle

it takes repetitve times 

to destroy something with a simple rattle

im at fault for my own uphill battle…
I stretch out my arms and remain silent

its killing us;

my silence…

is it right to be this way to detour the fights

I dont look forward to my nights

but I pray for my nights
in my city it barely rains

but when it pours;

it never drains

i stand in a rising puddle soon to be submerged

Im colliding with the action 

im unresponsive to the urge 

we cant communicate without throwing words…

  

As Always… 

Stay Positive!

Everywhere I Go…


Everywhere I go
No matter where I go
I know I take you with me…

wherever I go
no matter where I go
I know your here with me…

I live our memories
I carry you in my heart
wherever I go…

your always with me
everywhere I go
wherever I go…

unbeknownst the layers are thick
bloodline carry unique demographic

roads traveled; long
I don`t understand the words
automatic somethings we build on

heart in tune
the rhythm to my spine
I understand… undeniable time

working all day
with stress piling on
caffeinated drink in my hand
that’s not going cut it for too long
got you on my back telling me I’m wrong
feel like a slave
and I need me a song
cuz im here holding on
and with that said “I’m goin carry on”

you left me in the flames of the day light
knowing you weren’t going to extinguish me by night
seeking for at least one way to get right
but I`m alright

and I see and I know
i`m at peace with no fear
i`m ready to go
the devil is calling
my clock ticks slow
clouds ride and sit low…

everywhere i go…

© Da Absentee 2012

“Thoughts – 21”


I dont know when i hit rock bottom
but i know as the days go
it seems that i hit it more often
that pit in my stomach
the clog of my throat
the blood pressure
passing through my heart
the lost of…
feels like its ready to explode
out my chest
talking about grasping
Talking about suppressing
i find my therapy
stressing
unrelenting
depressing,
anxiety fleshing a quandary
killing myself with prying
i dont even know if i`m dying
anger is next
one of the feelings i rarely get
i never let alot take me there
a duck in water
every and all things
need to run off my back
cant afford any extra weight
the hate
the despair
let it all wash me off
displace and disappear
sidenote
I enjoy the dry air up here
to bad its so thin
no traveling
it cant take me somewhere
i’m trying to get far away
From this place that leads to nowhere…

(C) Da Absentee 2013

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“Dilemma”


Clean page
blank slate
dont know how words form
but they end up in place

this life my life
2 wrongs after 1 right
so im moving
just in the wrong direction

i hold onto them
they make me feel
feel like me
only feeling that holds true to me

ive been in my own shadow
for too long
i dont know who I really am
pondering if i belong

they keep me sane
they give me hope
they help me withstand the fire
instead of disappear in smoke

i see light
i see dark
i see soul
i see flesh

Question is?!
Do I see myself?…

Da Absentee (c) 2012

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