9 – I Wish


I wish we all had more than enough
More than material wealth
I wish we could take care of ourselves
With so much to lose and so much to gain
can’t we all be friends
Wish i could talk to my fallen again
I wish i didn’t fit a profile
I wish the system would stop with the lies
I live in the land of the free
but when it comes to air…
It feels like they tryna take it away from me…
I wish to silence all the tears
Dry all the cries
I wish we could try.
Love each other And kiss the hate goodbye…

© Da Absentee 2013

As always…

Stay Positive!

9 – Who Are You Really


your life is not suppose to be this hard?
really?..
who said it was supposed to be easy?
who said everything is going to go as planned?
matter of fact!
who told you, you were going to get everything you want?
who are you to ask for more than you need?
what work have you put in?
where is your provisions?
where have you paid dues?
what makes you think you can fill someone else shoes?
just because you think & say you want to…

© Da Absentee 2013

As Always…

Stay Positive!

0 – Thoughts – 22


thoughts

As my years seem to go by
I look in the reflection to smirk
battled far, battled long
I fight hard and seem to always carry a song
sometimes that seems to strike me empty
I miss my love
wish I had more family to share my love
I have been torn, broken
it seems I was always on a track
to be outspoken from the clan
I see my brother
don’t understand how he went wrong
I speak to my sister,
I just wanna shake her
scream at her “whats wrong?”
We all can’t be the same line
that my parents, who love to say they spent money on
I laugh, 
I really have lost the lust for it
too bad the thing about my birthdays
as far as I can remember
I have always felt solemn like this

© Da Absentee 2012 revised 2024

“As Always…. Stay Positive!”

Birthday: 3/9

9 – I’m Goin Carry On


unbeknownst the layers are thick
bloodline carry unique demographic

long roads traveled
I don`t understand the words of this world
automatic somethings we build on with quiet things heard

heart in tune
the rhythm to my spine
I understand… undeniable time

working all day with stress piling on
caffeinated drink in my hand
that’s not going cut it for too long
got you on my back telling me I’m wrong
a servant need of a song
however i’m here holding on…
“I’m goin carry on”

© Da Absentee 2024

“As Always…. Stay Positive!”

9 – Thoughts – 25


IMG_0299

Life is constantly always something new

New hurdle or obstacle

New blemish or spot

New fork or path

Always a new place to go

We can never expect the smooth

Always looking or living in the rough

The things that escape or get away from us…
© Da Absentee 2015 revised 2024

As Always…

Stay Positive!

9 – Thoughts – 26


thoughts

It all passes. The realization of it all. This life is a walking, living contradiction battle. A duality lesson. Everything is real & fake at the same time. So…

I take this ride every now and then. When I close my eyes momentarily, I steal moments. Stealing moments from the reality I have constructed; stealing moments from everything as they steal my moments…

We do this dance of real & fake. Tit for tat. I hit you, you hit me back. Just enough, insuring that we are not lost. I’m pretty sure I have paid some piper. All that he is owed. He has given all he could show…

Doing this gives unusual discomfort. What should be the use of my time?…

I claim I am man. I claim I am who I am…

Yet still…

I claim to be so much more. I want…

I need…

So much more than before…

© Da Absentee 2015 revised 2024

As Always…

Stay Positive!

9 – Thoughts – 27


thoughts

Everytime. I think about this life

It shouldn’t work that way

It shouldn’t work this way

Still here but bitter. all the time

Here with mine (decisions)

Live with mine (decisions)

Everytime. I tell myself.

Im human.

Make good ones make bad ones (decisions)

Pulled myself thru my-self made hell

This life I pieces / placed together

Everytime.

I’m trying to figure this life out

Figure what I am about…

It’s truly time…

© Da Absentee 2015 revised 2024

As Always…

Stay Positive!

9 – Happy Forever


Happy… Forever…

When I first sat down to write this I thought “Oh this is going to be easy!” All I have to do is tell my thoughts to the world and wish them a happy life.

Then it hit me “When you say it like that..” It seems easy enough, but to actually pick and assemble the best set of words and thoughts to say all of that in like 3 minutes. That’s when it gets a little bit harder. How could I… I mean really grasp what I wanted to say.

Praise, Acknowledgement, Family, Commitment and Love in a couple of paragraphs. How could I assure everyone who reads this; to let them know that through the trials, hard times and just life in general; that marriage is a good decision for both parties, that this is how it is meant to be. That “Love can conquer all”  it just needs respect & reverence to keep it in line. To be able to tell newlyweds that this is a symbol, a contract, unyielding and completely binding. A true test of forever.

Some people could never share and discuss their lives with friends like they can family. Now when I say family, I mean there’s no way you can deny this person of being who they are to you. When you say loyal, supportive, stubborn, a down right pain in the ….,  someone to never skimp words and always tell you when your wrong or right, stand by you in a fight. To always be there even if you can’t see them, just like the stars at night. You can always depend on them to be who he or she is and to follow through.

I know sometimes; more importantly in today’s world, that this can turn into a fling or some disillusionment. It doesn’t matter if it’s your one & only marriage or your 5th. If it is truly for the right reason and it is a friend you truly believe you can spend your life with. Do it! We (humans) need companions to fulfill life’s purpose.

Even in my life the concept had to be reinitiated. Parts of my life had to be stripped and reset. I still believe it’s a good idea.

Individuals that take these steps, fulfilling centuries of mankind trying to come together for a definitive purpose. To finally see them coming together to make a statement in front of their family and friends. Where they make history with a rite of passage and celebration. To hold each other so dear and close. This was always down the road, and everyone here knows that this is not the easy way out. So as these and many more of the memories to come and linger on for years I wish the world a strong and healthy life.

Marriage is dedication, the battling of life together. It is poetry. It is love songs. The union can be dreams. Reality and fantasy… Bonded, together… In my opinion…

Happy… Forever…

As Always…

Stay Positive!

9 – Levels


megaphone

Knock, knock knocking
faint
can you hear it, the echoes
because its hollow inside
empty and not holding
like a kite which glides

knock, knock knocking
mellow
it permeates the fleshy eardrum skin
can you hear the beat from within
adhesive to bass and strings

knock, knock knocking…
Normal
like dancing to speech
it is reserved but always in reach
I am listening
I am your student
please teach

knock, knock knocking
loud
I need you to get here
excuses at this point is nothing I want to hear
I know you know better
so do so with care

knock, knock knocking
screaming
when I see you
your dead
you hear…

© Da Absentee 2011 revised 2024

As Always…

Stay Positive!

9 – Your Course


Clox Da Absentee

Is the fault really yours
should you have seen, known all the signs
should you have recognized
that they needed more than you
more than one
more than you could have ever provided

don’t be crazy to believe
let someone tell you, It’s all your fault
is it your fault?
don`t know…
you shouldn’t care
because as of right now
that kind of thinking
will get you nowhere

they were damaged and bruised
that’s how they were received
that’s how they came to you
threats of life taking are numbing you
if that’s what they want
let them go ahead and do it already

only thing you do now
is wait, the waiting
you need more time
you need to take this into your own hands
force it down, elongate that spine

some will examine
some will say its shitty
some will call it pity
you were  trapped by vicinity
you couldn’t help
if you didn’t know how
can’t help if you don’t intervene
somehow their weak
they can’t move past hence
the past is constantly kicking their ass
if not clipped
they will attempt flight
which will be their last

You should be on a mission to cleanse
no more pretend
mind may be racing
without seeing an end
it’s a longer road than desired
but it’s yours
your monster, your friend
uncalculated unrestricted
your unconquerable end

© Da Absentee 2012

As Always…

Stay Positive!

9 – Answering The Questions…


Sorry for the confusion…

Thank you for using me to capture a thought.

On to the questions…

.

“How the fuck am I supposed to know?”

Your not, i should have taken the time to place an eloquent comment, with proper sentence structure and context.

.

“Are you friend or foe?”

Friend.

.

“Do you know?”

I do, i have no reason to be your enemy.

.

“Ain’t no gray so are you going or staying?”

Staying… i am a fan

.

“Ain’t no gray so do you love me or do you hate me?”

Love you.

.

“How the fuck am I supposed to know if you don’t actually say so?”

Your not. I have to tell you.

.

“Are your actions the distractions or vice versa?”

My actions are my actions. No distraction.

.

“Ain’t no gray so are you coming or going?”

Coming. Matter fact i am always “coming” to see how its “going”.

.

“What does what you chose to say really mean?”

What I should have said….

This piece is cute! Love the title. I can actually picture or see you or another woman, delivering this message to a possible suitor or someone trying to pick you up. When i read it. The closing to me has hints of sarcasm that i can relate too. Also the tie with the bones, your hair and the filter makes you look very appealing. #cute

.

“Does it mean what i think that you think that i think it means?”

You wouldn’t know. We cant read each others minds. This setting is terrible relaying all that emotion and inference.

.

“Does it mean anything?”

It means i liked the post. I liked the picture.

.

I’m sorry for the confusion. I should have taken more care. I stepped into your space, feeling to comfortable and letting caution travel by air.

.

I’m sorry for the confusion. Sarcasm is funny to me. Its where you can find me more than regularly.

.

I’m sorry for the confusion. I love your work. I should support your work. I dont think your stupid or dumb as fuck.

.

I’m sorry for the confusion. Thanks for acknowledging me. I see you! Thanks for a 15 second moment of fame in your universe.

.

Signed your fan.

.

Da Absentee